Category: Thursday 04.27pm, CLC2008 Multimedia University, why the hell did I not get up for the 8am class, is the only thing running in my mind! So many thing is not nearly how it’s suppose to be, missed my morning 8am tutorial, and now that i plan to replace the missed session with the 4pm tutorial class, the lecturer is missing, and after 20 minutes some guy comes in announcing that the 4pm class is cancel due to some reason that i dint not catch, and there goes my attendance for today. One by one leaves the class heading somewhere, but I’m still sitting in the class thinking what can i do next… Its not likely for me to think of what can i do next for there will be always something to do, yet particularly today I just sit and wonder what should I do….
There is someone i wanna please in everything I do, but these days it feel very cold how i feel about this person. I agree that I have a very bad time management skill, yet its not that I did not spend time, yet the statement, “you don’t spend proper time with me” who said that this is how much time you should spend and is considered proper and not, time is precious even its just a minute but how do i make her understand?
So be it that I’m wrong, how else can someone apologize than saying I’m truly sorry of what had happen, since we are so far apart! Even though I truly truly am sorry she don’t even believe me 1% of how bad I feel of the situation, it is damn hurting when someone claim be in love if you cant sense its genuine or fake, how do i make her understand?
Even worse, break-up.. I can’t seem to understand why is it like candy to everyone? What kinda love is it for a second “you mean the world to me” and the next “I don’t need you”… Everything has difficulties in it, even in studies, when u do your math’s its not all easy all the way, but you go saying I not gonna do math’s anymore! But how come when some small misunderstanding arise people go like “I don’t need u anymore” what kinda love is this, how can I ever make her understand?
How can I make her understand, that she is the only person I had ever imagine to be with; that boys will be boys yet I’m as equal to be like dead without her. How can I make her understand when someone loves you, even the way they say your name is different? Its not just those flirtatious words can say love but simple things can also pronounce love! When I first saw you, I knew something was different about you and I wanted to talk to you for the longest time and get to know you the best, and I did… But now that I know you the best I don’t have much to say but great actions to perform. We have both gone through so much in our lives; we’ve both been hurt and have lost trust in others, but I ask you to give me a chance. I don’t ask for much, only for you to love me as I am and not to hurt me as I would not hurt you. I only wish to be by your side and with no one else…
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I can very much relate to the questions you have in your head, because I have them too. Perhaps it is not love they feel but a moment of need to fill an emptiness they have, which we possibly did the job for. As painful as it may be, I’ll say focus on the greater good. Let no one kid you … “time heals and all that” … the darkness of this episode will always remain; there will always be instances which will make you stop dead on your tracks during the day, reminding you of her, through sight, sound and even smell simply because they chose to be cruel with their words. Find the closure you need, my friend.
[Thanks my friend, it feels much better]
Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing. “Optimus Prime”
Always keep moving forward dude! There are always shit happening whether we want it or not.